CANDID TALK : We’re definitely sacking MP Tajiri Tumbo Kubwa

The Uswaz MP Hon Dr Tajiri Tumbo Kubwa (his doctorate is questionable) is a very clever man especially as we approach general elections. His ingenuity is evident in Uswaz in the way he organizes the young and the old in some sorts of groupings – football teams, women groups and similar units that ensures as many people as possible are, like cows, are herded together to deliver votes when the time comes.

In all my miserable life, diligent obedience to my throat to get it sloshed with real beer has many a time caused me serious grief. Deep love for all types of drinkables can perhaps explain why I have physical and emotional scars. As a result, I do most stupid things such as taking shortcuts through graveyards to avoid meeting people I owe money, even in devil hours of the night. I am willing to risk my throat being gripped by cold hands of a zombie straight from hell than bump onto my...

Wonders never cease! The 11th wonder of the world is this game practiced in Spain, Portugal and Mexico,whereby a very, very angry bull drunk on devil-knows-what bulls raring to kill someone are unleashed in narrow streets to charge at eager people.

The guy who came up with the Valentine’s Day idea should die. It is the day when men and women clad in red and brandishing red roses make asses out of themselves. If he were living today, I would recommend that he be hanged at a public place for it. I would do this because even a “professional” wife beater like Hussein the Uswaz wag or Voicemail Kemilembe, the woman known to have an eye for anything in a trouser, pretend to be to be lovers for life – a one day show....

>My one-and-only Bisho Ntongo and I are having a ‘good’  time in Katerero on the shores of Lake Victoria. Her father had demanded that I show my ugly face lest he calls back Bisho over unpaid dowry balance. Everything is so changed here that I am considering relocating here for good. Pull out a few msimbazis (Sh10,000 banknotes) and the entire village will worship you.

Sometimes, I think that most Uswaz men ought to earn esteemed tittle minister for “Wetlands and Irrigation”. This is because of our penchant for playing God by raining on anything within our sight. If the “Passport Size Latrines” happen to be far away, and our bladders threaten to do balloon-bursts, we don’t shy from wetting anything in our sight; walls, trees, protected parks and so forth.

Ni jambo lilo wazi kuwa watu wote hawawezi kuwa sawa, hivyo watu wote hawawezi  kuwa matajiri. Hivyo kulipo na matajiri  wakubwa na  maskini nao ni wengi. Kwa sababu tajiri na maskini wanategemeana.  Utajiri hauwezi kuwepo bila kuwepo umaskini.Kwa mantiki hiyo ili tajiri awepo maskini lazima awepo na   maskini akiwepo  na tajiri atakuwepo, wote wanategemeana. Kanuni hii ni kwa watu na hata nchi.Ni kweli matajiri wanachukia umaskini  na maskini wenyewe wanatamani utajiri. Hivyo si rahisi kwa...

Sporah Njau
To a large extent, and for all the right reasons, we all have dreams and aspirations. We are constantly encouraged to dare, dream big and seize any great opportunity that jot in our lives. Dreaming and acting on our dreams or opportunities is only sure way for the complete circle of manifestation. A few years ago, a young lady from Northern Tanzania, a student/ immigrant in the United Kingdom, saw an opportunity and decided it was time to manifest her passion that was hidden...

Candid, objective; say many on Kikwete speech
Daily News
ACADEMICIANS and other members of the public yesterday hailed the weekend speech by CCM National Chairman, President Jakaya Kikwete, describing it as ''candid and reflective of the reality on the ground as far as the current political context is ...